Friday, March 6, 2009

Waking up

I feel like I am waking up after a long nap. I am starting to touch base with friends again. I am starting to blog again. I have yet to figure out where my dad is going but that he will go has helped a great deal. He is on new meds for his "emotional outbursts" as the doctor put it. They seem to help. We don't walk on as many eggshells now. Everyone has been sick so we have stayed clear of his living area as not to expose him to it. I worry that my children will never have positive feelings towards their grandfather. They have seen the harsh reality of aging too young as far as I am concerned. I wish I could go back in time and do things differently but I can't. I can however try and make things better from this point forward. I am afraid the guilt I carry from bringing him here will remain for some time. The husband and I are working things out. Now if I can just stay awake and move forward things will be better.